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Instead of the Oscars, I Watched Comedians Drunkenly Praise Old Movies

Instead of watching the Academy Awards on Sunday, I went to a benefit show with drunk comedians.
Get Out image courtesy Universal

Disclaimer: I’m friendly with Eric Thurm, who hosted the Drunk Education show.

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This past Sunday evening, during the time the Academy Awards were ripping away, I instead went to Drunk Education’s Anti-Oscar benefit show (proceeds went to support RAINN, an anti-rape and abuse network). Drunk Education shows are about smart, funny people who may or may not actually be drunk giving funny, pointed, powerpoint presentations, and this one was particularly amazing.

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There were takedowns of abusive men in Hollywood, breakdowns of great messages in movies to teach to tween girls, an impassioned plea for Sandra Oh to get a goddamned Oscar, and a beautiful examination of trash TV. All of it felt blessedly productive, because I didn’t have to watch the Oscars (and money went to RAINN).

I have a storied relationship with the Academy Awards. Back in film school (yes, Virginia, I went to film school for my MA, and yes, I am a walking stereotype), I would attend Oscar parties and argue for my favorites and say all the things terrible film students say when they think they are Very Smart. It was awful.

I mean, I had fun at the time, but I cringe harder at that phase than pretty much any other in my life, and that’s saying something. In later years, I grew tired of the schtick and pageantry and faux posturing of rich celebrities. The Hollywood-ness of it all, as it is, after all, the most Hollywood thing that occurs each year.

The Shape of Water image courtesy Fox Searchlight

It’s very nice when, say, Meryl Streep calls out Trump for his awful bullying (yes, that was at the Golden Globes, it's CLOSE ENOUGH). And it’s better when amazing creatives win, which happened this year, as I found out via Twitter. Jordan Peele won best screenplay for Get Out and The Shape of Water somehow won best picture.

But those wonderful moments aren’t really enough to make me want to watch hours of garbage in real time. Not anymore, really. And of course, it's very easy for me to watch the best clips on social media for the next week afterwards.

The posturing and pageantry just makes me tired, and then I start wondering about all the places and things everyone who is there actually wants to be doing. Then I think about the monetary value of the whole shebang, and it becomes like a very depressing The Matrix scroll: all just walking dollar signs in too-expensive suits and dresses.

And no, I don’t think you are a bad person if you like the Oscars! You can totally like the Oscars, and I won’t judge you. I just prefer, at this junction, to watch drunk comedians tell me about their favorite movies.

What about you, dear reader? Do you love, or hate, or love to hate the Oscars? Let me know on the forums!