It's hard to put a finger on exactly why and how this tweet is so perfectly Jets-y, but it is undeniably one of the more Jets-y news items that has ever come out. If the buttfumble—the goddamned buttfumble—represents the on-field ethos of the New York Jets, the absurd dysfunction of Muhammad Wilkerson missing a defensive meeting wherein he was to be greeted by a birthday cake captures the spirit of the Jets off the field far better than even this guy:Mo Wilkerson missed walk-thru before Ravens game and a defensive meeting where team had a cake to celebrate his birthday, per @MikeGarafolo.
— Dan Hanzus (@DanHanzus) November 7, 2016
Both Wilkerson and Sheldon Richardson were held out of the first quarter in Miami yesterday for what Todd Bowles initially said was a "coach's decision." It's since been reported that both had missed team meetings, and Wilkerson in particular also missed a walk through before last week's game against Baltimore.These would be bad things to have going on with any professional football team—which, at 3-6, the Jets technically are—but it's not enough for the Jets to have bad things happen to them. Those bad things must also be embarrassing and almost inexplicable; not bad injury luck, or not just that, but the usual bad luck combined with falling for a fake spike, or drafting Kyle Brady instead of Warren Sapp, or having a head coach's foot fetish videos released to the world, or losing on a second kickoff return because you were called offside on the first one, or having the face of the franchise—literally the only good thing about the team—drunkenly proposition a sideline reporter during a primetime game, or having your best player go to your bitter rival, win a Super Bowl, only to return and be absolute garbage within two years, or signing a legendary, Hall-of-Fame quarterback and seeing him send unwanted dick pictures to a member of your staff, forever tarnishing his legacy within months of stepping foot in New Jersey, or having a quarterback named Bubby Brister, or having a punter named Tom Tupa play quarterback, or losing your starting quarterback because a teammate broke his jaw over a $600 debt, or getting into a bitter contract stalemate with Ryan freaking Fitzpatrick, or having a coach resign via abbreviations on a fucking napkin rather than coach your hapless and going-nowhere franchise, only to see him then go on to coach your division rival and establish himself as quite possibly the greatest coach in the history of professional football, or having a goddamned birthday cake go to waste because the guy it was for didn't even bother to show up for work.Things like that.